What If We Didn’t Need To Say It?

Sometimes I think about this phrase, neurodiversity affirming. It's everywhere right now. In Instagram bios, on websites, in articles, and in conference talks. People proudly write that they are neurodiversity affirming, and I get it, I really do. We've spent so long misunderstanding differences, so it makes sense to put it out there, to say, "I see you. I accept you." That's very important.

Accepting differences, noticing strengths, and honoring preferences all matter. Every single person deserves that. But sometimes I catch myself wishing we didn't even have to say it.

I wish kindness and openness toward differences were just normal. Not something we need to announce publicly. Not something we need to label in our bios to prove we are safe. I wish it were the baseline.

But it's not, and that's the part that's hard to swallow.

Most people don't know how to interact with autistic children. Especially the ones who are nonspeaking or have significant regulation challenges. People don't know what to do with the unknown, with what feels different. And honestly, it's not because they are unkind. It's because the unknown is uncomfortable. Discomfort makes us pull back. And pulling back is the opposite of connection.

I keep thinking, what if we could show them? Not just tell them about acceptance, but actually show them the joy of connecting with these children. The laughter. The excitement. The curiosity. The little moments of pride and accomplishment that are, honestly, pure magic. What if more people could see it firsthand?

This is exactly why I post my videos online. I know a lot of people don't like it. They worry it might put a child in danger, or they question whether the child can meaningfully consent. I want to be clear: I always have the parents’ full permission for these children. Ultimately, what they want for their child is their decision, and I respect that fully. I also truly believe that the kids I play with would be proud to have their videos out there if it means inspiring even one more person to connect with children like them the way I do.

I imagine a world where connecting with autistic children, or anyone who seems different, is just naturally fun. Where people don't feel nervous or awkward because they don't know what to do. Where curiosity, patience, and joy replace fear of the unknown. That kind of shift could change culture. It could make the world a happier place for everyone.

Maybe that's the real goal. Not just to say we affirm neurodiversity. Not just to add a label or a hashtag. But to live it in our actions, in our relationships, in the way we show up in the world. To make a connection is the normal response. To let joy and understanding lead.

If more people could experience that, the fun, the connection, the pure delight of meeting a child where they are, I think it could ripple out. Maybe not overnight, but slowly. Maybe it could shift the way our culture thinks about differences.

Maybe one day we would live in a world where no one needed to say I am neurodiversity affirming because it would already be just who we are.

If this resonated with you, I’d love to hear your thoughts, whether you’re a parent, a clinician, or someone who loves a child who sees the world differently. You can find me on Instagram at @bloomdevelopmentalcenter or reach out through the website. These conversations matter, and I’m always listening.